Eat cake, buttery, sweet, bright, thoroughly delicious plum cake

August 15, 2014

Buttery, Sweet, Bright, Thoroughly Delicious Plum Cake / JillHough.com

My mom is not well.

Although she lives on her own, increasingly she needs help, which is stressful for us both. Often when I leave her apartment, as I pass by my favorite specialty food store on the way home, I itch to stop for something sweet. But then I see the mechanism, I see myself wanting to soothe myself with food. And so I pat myself on the back for noticing, for interrupting the urge, and continue home.

I shared this recently in my caregivers support group—something I recommend wholeheartedly, by the way, wholeheartedly—expecting them to also congratulate me for resisting temptation.

But instead they said—in no uncertain terms—noooooo! Have the ice cream or cake or chocolate. Have it! This caregiving thing is hard, this illness thing is awful. Do what you can to feel good, to treat yourself, whenever you can.

And you know what? They were right.

Buttery, Sweet, Bright, Thoroughly Delicious Plum Cake / JillHough.com

The triumph isn’t in resisting. It’s in seeing the temptation and then making a choice. Sometimes that choice might be to skip it. Others it might be to indulge.

I mean, how many things really make you happy, after all? Shouldn’t you grab every one of them, and often? Not absentmindedly and with automaticity, but conscientiously and willfully, so as to revel in and thoroughly appreciate them.

Right?!?

Stone fruits make me happy—summer stone fruits that are bright and flavorful and brimming with all a stone fruit can be.

And so, this being summer and me being occasionally stressed about my mom, I’ve been making this buttery, sweet, bright, thoroughly delicious plum cake and enjoying every bite.

Eat cake. Revel in what makes you happy.

Buttery, Sweet, Bright, Thoroughly Delicious Plum Cake / JillHough.com

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8 thoughts on “Eat cake, buttery, sweet, bright, thoroughly delicious plum cake

  1. Jennie Schacht

    Jill, you are a model daughter. Absolutely 100% you deserve to feel good. And if plum cake does it, easy answer! Just don’t set yourself up for an excuse to feel bad about yourself later. (I almost never feel bad about eating fruit desserts — they’re too good!) Wishing ease to your mom, and to you. xox

  2. Jane, The Heritage Cook

    Jill,
    Your mom is incredibly lucky to have such a loving and caring daughter. The trick to surviving the bad days is doing exactly what your group said, find little joys to celebrate. This is a beautiful treat that would bring a smile to everyone’s face. Thank you for sharing your story and recipe Jill.

  3. Jill Post author

    Thank you so much for saying so, Jennie. I hear you re: feeling bad later. That’s why I think making a conscientious choice is important vs. a knee-jerk never or always. And–amen to fruit desserts, my Farmers Market Dessert friend!

  4. Jill Post author

    Thanks for stopping by and commenting, Thalia! I looked at your blog–beeeautiful, and delicious! Thank you again :)

  5. Jill Post author

    Thank you for all your kind words, Jane. I definitely don’t feel loving and caring when I leave her and start itching to stop for ice cream! But you’re right–it’s about finding little joys to celebrate, like cake :) Isn’t that the key to everything, really? (Little joys, but cake, too!)

  6. susan @ the wimpy vegetarian

    I vote for giving into temptation and treating yourself. My mom had Alzheimer’s and I know how stressful life can be when caregiving. It sounds like your mom might live nearby, and what a blessing that is for her. Just be sure to take care of yourself and have some of this fabulous-looking cake.

  7. Jill Post author

    Thanks so much for reading and your comment, Susan. You know of what I speak! Any other tips for keeping ones sanity? There’s only so much cake…

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